The Gifts Project

Friendship is the best gift you can offer isolated elders — and it's the best gift they can give in return. But, giving of ourselves can seem to be an intangible thing, and the process sometimes illusive.

In such circumstances, before friendships are formed or while they are in an early stage, tangible gifts can play a special role. They can provide a chance to "break the ice".

This is especially true around holidays.

Holidays, particularly those at the end of the calendar year, can be uniquely trying for isolated
elders. A sense of loneliness can be magnified when there is a cultural emphasis on being with family and friends and you don't have any. The Gifts Project (also known as Troy's Gift Project in honor of one of its founders) is a compassionate and practical response to this loneliness and isolation.

Troy Wheeler and Janet von Doepp founded The Gifts Project in November of 1994 when they were both associated with Unity Christ Church on the West Side of San Francisco, near Stonestown. Troy, who was very ill at the time, and Janet, delivered 40 stuffed animals (given to them by fellow church members) to the Activity Director at Nineteen Avenue Healthcare Center nearby who was moved to tears by the unsolicited presents. Unity became a participating member of San Francisco Ministry to Nursing Homes soon after.

A year later, during a volunteer recognition luncheon for Unity members, the minister asked "What is your heart's desire?" and while everyone was speaking mainly of themselves, Troy, who at this point was gravely ill, got to his feet and said, "That every resident in a nursing home in San Francisco receive a holiday gift." Troy died four days later and Janet, impelled by his last wish, vowed to see it come true and started The Gifts Project on the spot.

The Gifts Project has flourished. For the past few years, Janet has involved many more volunteers, not only from her own church but from other congregations and from other civic organizations, too. In 2005, the Gifts Project collected and disbursed more than 2,500 presents - teddy bears, jewelry, scarves, pens, soap, shampoo, etc at Christmas time. Janet has also begun to gather and deliver gifts during other holidays as well.

For a long time, Janet gathered, wrapped and stored these gifts in the home she shares with her husband, Chris. And Chris had been very patient with this. But last year, when the gifts really started piling up, Kindred Healthcare (owner of Nineteenth Avenue Healthcare Center and four other nursing homes in the City) honored Janet at a volunteer recognition luncheon and offered to rent storage space for the Project.

The Gifts Project became an official program of ELDERGIVERS in January of 2005, an association which provides the project with the tax-exempt umbrella it needs to accept a growing number of financial donations, donations which are then used to purchase more gifts. This closer association which ELDERGIVERS and The Gifts Project are forging now has also given Janet the impetus to involve nursing home residents more fully in the project — not only as recipients of holiday generosity, but as givers, too. During the past few months, Janet and her crew of volunteers have gone into the nursing homes and engaged the higher- functioning residents in the process of wrapping presents for distribution. This reciprocity produces a double win when elders realize they are not only objects of care but providers of it too and contributors to the good of the whole community.

Jewelry for women: bracelets, clip-on earrings, pins
Slippers that do not slip
Socks for men or women
Lap robes for keeping lap and legs warm

Light weight sweaters for men or women
T-shirts, sweat shirts and/or sweat pants in pretty colors for women
and in black, grey or navy for men
Barrettes, "scrunchies", scarves for men or women
Lamb's wool booties, colorful knee socks

Watches and/or clocks - especially with large numbers
Point and shoot cameras, CDs, (show tunes, Swing songs)
Jigsaw puzzles with 500 pieces of fewer
Magazines, books - especially in large print

Combs, brushes, mirrors, lotions, lipsticks, mildly-scented perfumes
Sachets, hankerchiefs, small plants

Videos of old movies, nature, comedies
Water-color paints, colored pencils, sketch pads
Flashlights with batteries
Arts and crafts supplies

Hand towels, dresser scarves, non-breakable knick knacks
Mobiles, large wall calendars, address books, date books
Writing paper, note cards (stamps are wonderful!)
Large-faced playing cards
Small items for Bingo prizes
Small tote bags (to hang on a walker or wheelchair)

Small pictures, photo frames, eye glass cases
Wallets, transistor radios, tape recorders with ear phones
Small baskets, boxes and tins to hold small gifts
Holiday wrapping paper, ribbon, Scotch tape, tags.